In article <btpv64$1ria$1@pencil.math.missouri.edu>, Mark Graffis says...

.                        QUOTES ABOUT BUSH

"The United States is putting together a Constitution now for
Iraq. Why don't we just give them ours?  It's served us well
for 200 years, and we don't appear to be using it anymore,
so what the hell?"
        -- Jay Leno

"President Bush has been silent on Schwarzenegger.
Of course, he can't pronounce Schwarzenegger."
        -- David Letterman

"Here's how bad California looks to the rest of the country.
People in Florida are laughing at us."
       -- Jay Leno

"Well, we're all excited because President Bush has started his
35-day vacation. He's down there in Crawford, Texas, and on the
first day of his vacation he went fishing. He didn't find any fish
but he believes they're there and that his intelligence is accurate."
        -- David Letterman

"President Bush held his first full press conference in over 5
months this week. He announced that the war on terrorism is
continuing, much, much more work needs to be done on the
economy, then he said, 'I'm going on vacation for a month.'"
        -- Jay Leno

"President Bush is leaving to go to Crawford, Texas, for a
35-day working vacation. This should go over big with all
the people taking a can't-get-work vacation."
         -- David Letterman

"The White House says that the vacation in Texas will give
President Bush the chance to unwind. My question is, when
does the guy wind?"
         -- David Letterman

"President Bush's economic team is now on their jobs and
growth bus tour all across America. I think the only job
they created so far is for the guy driving the bus."
          -- Jay Leno

"President Bush has refused to declassify portions of the
congressional  9/11 reports about the Saudis, because he
says it will help the enemy. Not Al Qaeda - the Democrats."
          -- Jay Leno

                ~~~~~~~~  O*04?`0*O ~~~~~~~~

.                       SURGEONS BRAGGING

Three Texas surgeons were playing golf together and discussing
surgeries they had performed. One of them said, "I'm the best
surgeon in Texas. A concert pianist lost seven fingers in an
accident. I reattached them, and eight months later he performed
a private concert for the queen of England."

One of the others said, "That's nothing. A young man lost both
arms and a leg in an accident. I reattached them, and two years
later he won a gold medal in field events in the Olympics."

The third surgeon said, "You guys are amateurs. Several years
ago a cowboy who was high on cocaine and alcohol rode a horse
head-on into a train traveling 80 miles an hour. All I had left to
work with was the horse's ass and a cowboy hat. Now he's
president of the United States."

                ~~~~~~~~  O*04?`0*O ~~~~~~~~

The sport of choice for the urban poor is BASKETBALL.
The sport of choice for maintenance level employees is BOWLING.
The sport of choice for front-line workers is FOOTBALL.
The sport of choice for supervisors is BASEBALL.
The sport of choice for middle management is TENNIS.
The sport of choice for corporate officers is GOLF.
The President says he plays marbles, when he hasn't lost a few...

CONCLUSION:

The higher you are in the corporate structure, the smaller your
balls become.

                ~~~~~~~~  O*04?`0*O ~~~~~~~~

.                        PRESIDENTIAL RELIEF

Three years ago, before the inauguration, George Bush was
invited to a get acquainted tour of the White House. After
drinking several glasses of iced tea, he asked Bill Clinton if
he could  use his personal bathroom.

He was astonished to see that the President had a solid gold
urinal. That afternoon, George told his wife, Laura, about the
urinal. "Just think," he said," when I am President, I'll get to
have a gold urinal!"

Later, when Laura had lunch with Hillary at her tour of the
White House, she told Hillary how impressed George had
been with his discovery of the fact that, in the President's
private bathroom, the President had a gold urinal.

That evening, Bill and Hillary were getting ready for bed.
Hillary turned to Bill and said, "Well, I found out who pissed
in your saxophone."

                ~~~~~~~~  O*04?`0*O ~~~~~~~~

Perhaps Bush learned from that great Texan J.R. Ewing, who
when asked how he could do the dastardly things that he did
replied, "When you give up integrity, the rest is a piece of cake!"

                ~~~~~~~~  O*04?`0*O ~~~~~~~~

I don't approve of political jokes...
I've seen too many of them get elected.

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