In alt.alien.visitors H. Bosch <hbosch@charter.net> wrote:

Howdy Col. Mark.

It looks like Holeflapper is back with his rerun news
items.  I have learned that Holeflapper escaped because
it was against asylum rules to put him in a "straight"
jacket.  Him being the preverbal liar and all.  He was
locked in a dark room without access to a computer but
when the orderly tried to give Art his morning physic
(to keep him purged of fecal matter) he managed to slip
past the orderly and escape the asylum grounds.  He was
last seen running down one of the main streets of Salem
stark naked except for the blue ribbon tied to his
genitals.  Witnesses claimed he was complaining loudly
about being anal probed by aliens.  His whereabouts now
are unknown.

Long time no hear from you, hope all is well with you
and yours.  The BugEye Burger sales have topped over 25
billion this year so far.

Hope to hear from you again.

As always,

Capt.  Harry

  Howdy Capt. Harry!
  Well, I warned Wholeflaffer that he should turn himself back in
to the asylum and we would get his handlers to easy on him if he did.
  We'll see what happens.
  Good news about the BugEye sales report.
  We're moving right along on the new product line and the Grey sausage
links should be ready for marketing very soon. 

Sincerely.
Col. Mark