How many UFO debunkers does it take to screw in a lightbulb??
(Important updates-2011!)

And now, another letter from the e-mail grab-bag;
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Dear Sir Arthur Wholeflaffer,

How many UFO debunkers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Signed, Thoughtful
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Dear Thoughtful,

How many UFO debunkers does it take to screw in a lightbulb? This is
an easy question, and here is your answer! How many UFO debunkers does
it take to screw in a light bulb:

None, there simply is no light bulb to replace.  No one saw it, and
the person that claimed to have witnessed the ill-fated bulb was sadly
mistaken.  Perhaps it was a temperature inversion or ball lightning,
but no light bulbs!  What kind of college degree does the person who
"claimed" to have seen a burned-out light bulb have, and how does that
apply to materials research, energy consumption or even
illumination.

Nobody has ever "proved" to a debunkers satisfaction that there was
even a lightbulb to replace.  Either the person who "witnessed" the
light bulb was in serious error, or there is a more prosaic
explanation.  As a rule, those who "claim" that there are burned-out
light bulbs are little nobodies seeking celebrity status.  Also, we
must not rule out hoaxes, misidentifications of Venus and Mars, and
sleep paralysis; all of which can be easily mistaken for spent light
bulbs.

UPDATE, UPDATE, UPDATE: The Air Force has just definitively proved
that it was not a light bulb after all.  Thank goodness!!

Pentagon and NASA spokes-big-person Jimmy O-Borg dug up the facts to
this
35-year old case that everybody was wondering about!!  Here is what
REALLY happened:

During a training exercise over Area-51, Nevada, an Air Force pilot
accidentally opened an escape hatch, which inadvertently released some
crash-test dummies.  These "dummies" somehow hit a temperature
inversion pocket close to a swamp, which happened to have been
emitting some swamp gas at the exact same time a super-secret "Mogul"
weather balloon was coming in for a crash-landing.  On top of all
that, this happened ten years AFTER those that saw it remembered the
event.

In conclusion: Some time compressed crash-test dummies were
accidentally released during a temperature inversion while a weather
balloon was caught in some swamp gas.  Multiple witnesses to this
event easily mistook these dummies/balloons for a lightbulb.  In the
meantime, UFO debunkers are left in the dark.