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     BELLEFONTE, Pa. (Rueters) --
A surprise witness will testify for
the defense in the Jerry Sandusky
Pedophile Case.
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     Monsignor Guido Sarducci, who
has been flown here from the Vatican,
has remained incognito until spotted
eating a chilli dog at the Coney Island
on Main Street last Friday.
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      Sarducci is a world-famous
expert on hanky-panky within the
Catholic Church and author of the
book, "Sin, Sex, Satan and Me,"
still on The New York Timex Best
Seller List.
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     Well acquainted with the sexual
molestation of altar boys in some
29 countries, Sarducci is rather
familiar with the in's and out's of
sexual attraction certain grown
men have for young boys.
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     The Holy Man reportedly will
testify that God endows us with
a wide assortment of special
cravings.
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      He will explain that some people
just love sauerkraut or cheese blitzes.
for example , because The Big Guy
in the Sky has made all of our
special tastes rather unique.
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      Good 'ol Jerry simply was simply
endowed with a lusty appetite for
delicious youngsters.
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     Actually, Sarducci will admit
under oath that he personally has
a ravenous appetite for potato pan-
cakes -- bleenies, if your ancestors
came from Central Europe -- and
actually has eaten a stack this big
at one sitting.
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http://www.fathersarducci.com/images/sarduccioval.gif
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    We would be remiss if we did not
mention that the beloved monsignor,
who used to be on TV before getting
the boot and entering the seminary,
is considered by many in the Free
World to be a Living Saint.
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This NEWS BULLETIN has been
brought to you by:
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Ed Conrad Enterprises, LTD
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http://www.edconrad.com
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http://www.edconrad.org
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PENNSYLVANIA COLLEGES, UNIVERSITIES
<
Albright College 	Reading 	Berks 	Private
Allegheny College 	Meadville 	Crawford 	Private
Alvernia University 	Reading 	Berks 	Private
American College 	Bryn Mawr 	Montgomery 	Private
Antonelli Institute 	Erdenheim 	Montgomery 	Private
Arcadia University 	Glenside 	Montgomery 	                Private
Baptist Bible College 	Clarks Summit 	Lackawanna 	Private
Biblical Seminary 	Hatfield 	Montgomery 	Private
Bloomsburg University of Pennsylvania 	Bloomsburg 	Columbia 	Public
Bradford School 	Pittsburgh 	Allegheny 	Community College
Bryn Athyn College 	Bryn Athyn 	Montgomery 	Private
Bryn Mawr College 	Bryn Mawr 	Montgomery 	Private
Bucknell University 	Lewisburg 	Union 	Private
Bucks County Community College 	Newtown 	Schuylkill 	Community College
Butler County Community College 	Butler 	Butler 	Community College
Byzantine Catholic Seminary 	Pittsburgh 	Allegheny 	Private
Cabrini College 	Radnor 	Delaware 	Private
California University of Pennsylvania 	California 	Washington 	Public
Carlow University 	Pittsburgh 	Allegheny 	Private
Carnegie Mellon University 	Pittsburgh 	Allegheny 	Private
Cedar Crest College 	Allentown 	Lehigh 	Private
Central Pennsylvania College 	Summerdale 	Cumberland 	Private
Chatham University 	Pittsburgh 	Allegheny 	Private
Chestnut Hill College 	Philadelphia 	Philadelphia 	Private
Cheyney University 	Cheyney 	Delaware 	Public
Clarion University 	Clarion 	Clarion 	Public
Community College of Allegheny County 	Pittsburgh 	Allegheny
Community College
Community College of Beaver County 	Monaca 	Beaver 	Community College
Community College Philadelphia   	Philadelphia 	Philadelphia
Consolidated School of Business 	York 	York 	Community College
Curtis Institute of Music                              Philadelphia
Philadelphia
Delaware County Community College 	Media 	Delaware 	Community College
Delaware Valley College 	                Doylestown 	Bucks 	Private
DeSales University 	Center Valley 	Lehigh 	Private
Dickinson College 	Carlisle 	Cumberland 	Private
Drexel University 	Philadelphia 	Philadelphia 	Private
Duquesne University 	Pittsburgh 	Allegheny 	Private
East Stroudsburg University 	East Stroudsburg 	Monroe 	Public
Eastern University 	St. Davids 	Delaware 	Private
Edinboro University 	Edinboro 	Erie 	Public
Elizabethtown College 	Elizabethtown 	Lancaster 	Private
Evangelical Theological Seminary 	Myerstown 	Lebanon 	Private
Franklin and Marshall College 	Lancaster 	Lancaster 	Private
Free Gospel Bible Institute 	Export 	Westmoreland 	Private
Gannon University 	Erie 	Erie 	Private
Geneva College 	Beaver Falls 	Beaver 	Private
Gettysburg College 	Gettysburg 	Adams 	Private
Gratz College 	Melrose Park 	Montgomery 	Private
Grove City College 	Grove City 	Mercer 	Private
Gwynedd-Mercy College 	Gwynedd Valley 	Montgomery 	Private
Harcum College 	Bryn Mawr 	Montgomery 	Private
Harrisburg Area Community College 	Gettysburg 	Adams 	Community
College
Haverford College 	Haverford 	Delaware 	Private
Holy Family University 	Philadelphia 	Philadelphia 	Private
Immaculata University 	Immaculata 	Chester 	Private
Indiana University of Pennsylvania 	Indiana 	Indiana 	Public
Johnson College 	Scranton 	Lackawanna 	Community College
Juniata College 	Huntingdon 	Huntingdon 	Private
Keystone College 	La Plume 	Lackawanna 	Private
King's College 	Wilkes-Barre 	Luzerne 	Private
Kutztown University 	Kutztown 	Berks 	Public
La Roche College 	Pittsburgh 	Allegheny 	Private
La Salle University 	Philadelphia 	Philadelphia 	Private
Lackawanna College 	Scranton 	Lackawanna 	Community College
Lafayette College 	Easton 	Northampton 	Private
Lake Erie College of Osteopathic Medicine 	Erie 	Erie 	Private
Lancaster Bible College 	Lancaster 	Lancaster 	Private
Lancaster Theological Seminary 	Lancaster 	Lancaster 	Private
Lebanon Valley 	Annville 	Lebanon 	Private
Lehigh Carbon CC 	Schnecksville 	Lehigh 	Community College
Lehigh University 	Bethlehem 	Northampton 	Private
Lincoln University 	Lincoln University 	Chester 	Public
Lock Haven Univ 	Lock Haven 	Clinton 	Public
Lutheran Theological Seminary  	Gettysburg 	Adams 	Private
Lutheran Theological Seminary  	Philadelphia 	Philadelphia 	Private
Luzerne County CC 	Nanticoke 	Luzerne 	Community College
Lycoming College 	Williamsport 	Lycoming 	Private
Manor College 	Jenkintown 	Montgomery 	Private
Mansfield University 	Mansfield 	Tioga 	Public
Marywood University 	Scranton 	Lackawanna 	Private
Mercyhurst College 	Erie 	Erie 	Private
Messiah College 	Grantham 	Cumberland 	Private
Metropolitan Career Center 	Philadelphia 	Philadelphia
Millersville University 	Millersville 	Lancaster 	Public
Misericordia University 	Dallas 	Luzerne 	Private
Montgomery County Community College 	Blue Bell 	Montgomery
Moore College of Art & Design 	Philadelphia
Moravian College 	                Bethlehem
Mount Aloysius College 	Cresson 	Cambria 	Private
Muhlenberg College 	Allentown 	Lehigh 	Private
Neumann University 	Aston 	Delaware 	Private
Northampton Cc 	Bethlehem 	Northampton
Palmer Theological Seminary 	Wynnewood 	Montgomery
Peirce College 	Philadelphia 	Philadelphia
Penn State Abington 	Abington 	Montgomery
Penn State Altoona 	Altoona 	Blair 	Public
Penn State Beaver 	Monaca 	Beaver 	Public
Penn State Berks 	Reading 	Berks 	Public
Penn State Brandywine 	Media 	Delaware
Penn State College of Medicine 	Hershey 	Dauphin
Penn State Dickinson School of Law 	Carlisle 	Cumberland
Penn State DuBois 	DuBois 	Clearfield 	Public
Penn State Erie, The Behrend College 	Erie
Penn State Fayette 	Uniontown 	Fayette
Penn State Great Valley 	Malvern 	Chester 	Public
Penn State Greater Allegheny 	McKeesport 	Allegheny 	Public
Penn State Harrisburg 	Middletown 	Northampton
Penn State Hazleton 	Hazleton 	Luzerne 	Public
Penn State Lehigh Valley 	Center Valley 	Lehigh
Penn State Mont Alto 	Mont Alto 	Franklin 	Public
Penn State New Kensington 	New Kensington 	n/a
Penn State Schuylkill 	Schuylkill Haven 	Schuylkill
Penn State Shenango 	Sharon 	Mercer 	Public
Penn State Wilkes-Barre 	Lehman 	Pike 	Public
Penn State Worthington Scranton 	Dunmore 	Lackawanna
	Penn State York 	York 	York 	Public
Pennsylvania Academy of the Fine Arts 	Philadelphia
Pennsylvania College of Art & Design 	Lancaster 	Lancaster 	Private
PennA. College of Technology 	Williamsport 	Lycoming
PennA. Highlands CC 	Johnstown 	Cambria
PennA. Institute of Technology 	Media 	Delaware 	Private
Pennsylvania State University 	University Park 	Centre 	Public
Philadelphia Biblical University 	Langhorne 	Bucks 	Private
Philadelphia College of Osteopathic Medicine 	Philadelphia
Philadelphia University 	Philadelphia 	Philadelphia 	Private
Pittsburgh Filmmakers 	Pittsburgh 	Allegheny 	Private
Pittsburgh Technical Institute 	Oakdale 	Allegheny 	Community College
Pittsburgh Theological Seminary 	Pittsburgh 	Allegheny 	Private
PJA School, The 	Upper Darby 	Delaware 	Community College
Point Park University 	Pittsburgh 	Allegheny 	Private
Reading Area Community College 	Reading 	Berks 	Community College
Reconstructionist Rabbinical College 	Wyncote 	Montgomery 	Private
Reformed Episcopal Seminary 	Blue Bell 	Montgomery 	Private
Reformed Presbyterian Theological Seminary 	Pittsburgh 	Allegheny
Private
Robert Morris University 	Moon Township 	Allegheny 	Private
Rosemont College 	Rosemont 	Montgomery 	Private
Saint Charles Borromeo Seminary 	Wynnewood 	Montgomery
Saint Francis University 	Loretto 	Cambria 	Private
Saint Joseph's University 	Philadelphia 	Philadelphia 	Private
Saint Tikhon's Orthodox Theological Seminary 	South Canaan 	Wayne
Saint Vincent College 	Latrobe 	Westmoreland 	Private
Salus University 	Elkins Park 	Montgomery 	Private
Schuylkill Technology Center 	Marlin 	Schuylkill 	Community College
Seton Hill University 	Greensburg 	Westmoreland 	Private
Shippensburg University 	Shippensburg 	Franklin 	Public
Slippery Rock University 	Slippery Rock 	Butler 	Public
Susquehanna University 	Selinsgrove 	Snyder 	Private
Swarthmore College 	Swarthmore 	Delaware 	Private
Temple University 	Philadelphia 	Philadelphia 	Public
Thaddeus Stevens College of Technology 	Lancaster 	Lancaster
Community College
The Art Institute of Pittsburgh 	Pittsburgh 	Allegheny 	Private
The Art Institute of York 	York 	York 	Private
The Commonwealth Medical College 	Scranton 	Lackawanna 	Private
Thiel College 	Greenville 	Mercer 	Private
Thomas Jefferson University 	Philadelphia 	Philadelphia 	Private
Trinity School for Ministry 	Ambridge 	Beaver 	Private
University of Pennsylvania 	Philadelphia 	Philadelphia 	Private
University of Pittsburgh 	Pittsburgh 	Allegheny 	Public
University of Pittsburgh - Bradford 	Bradford 	McKean 	Public
University of Pittsburgh - Greensburg 	Greensburg 	Westmoreland
University of Pittsburgh - Johnstown 	Johnstown 	Cambria 	Public
University of Pittsburgh - Titusville 	Titusville 	Crawford 	Public
University of Scranton 	Scranton 	Lackawanna 	Private
University of the Arts, The 	Philadelphia 	Philadelphia 	Private
University of the Sciences in Philadelphia 	Philadelphia 	Philadelphia
	Private
Ursinus College 	Collegeville 	Montgomery 	Private
US Army War College 	Carlisle 	Cumberland 	Public
Valley Forge Christian College 	Phoenixville 	Chester 	Private
Vet Tech Institute 	Pittsburgh 	Allegheny 	Private
Villanova University 	Villanova 	Delaware 	Private
Washington and Jefferson College 	Washington 	Washington 	Private
Waynesburg University 	Waynesburg 	Greene 	Private
West Chester University of Pennsylvania 	West Chester 	Chester 	Public
Westminster College 	New Wilmington 	Lawrence 	Private
Westminster Theological Seminary 	Glenside 	Montgomery 	Private
Westmoreland County Community College 	Youngwood 	Westmoreland
Community College