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<         BREAKING NEWS
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     NEW YORK, NY (Rueters) --
A team of neurosurgeons has
has identified a modern-day
match for the petrified brain
discovered by Ed Conrad
between coal veins.
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    That lucky person happens
to be Bill O'Reilly (aka BillO
'Reilly), one of the two or three
dozen totally bigoted anchors
on Fox News.
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    "S tratta di una partita perfetta
(Translation: It's a perfect match,"
said Dr. Giovanni Christerfini, the
surgeon-in-chief. "Dio benedica
l'Italia (Translation: God bless Italy."
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    People everywhere wonder
why Dr. Christerfini made that last
comment because, hell, everyone
knows O'ReillY isn't even Italian.
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     But anyway, Ed Conrad found
this half of a petrified human brain
while looking for mushrooms in
spill banks left over from surface
mining in Pennsylvania's anthracite
region.
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At first good ol' Ed thought it was
part of an eons-old bowling  ball
and was rather surprised when
experts identified it as one neat
hemisphere of a petrified human
skull.
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    Along with Ed's other incredible
discoveries (see photos below), it
proves man -- in almost our present
form -- has been around since coal
was formed (appx. 279,998,012
years B.C.).
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YOU'VE BEEN TOLD A WHALE OF A LIE
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http://www.edconrad.com/pics/SaveTheWhale.jpg
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     In any event, the neurosurgeons
said --because of the petrified
brain's shape, size and the amount
of sheer nonsense which they have
found contained within -- the chances
of it NOT being a perfect match
for O'Reilly are just one in  some
134,070,450,000 (give or take a
few billion).
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    However, one of the neurosurgeons
told colleagues that he personally
believes the petrified brain seems
to be a perfect match for one Rush
Limbaugh.
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<========================
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OTHER DISCOVERIES BETWEEN COAL VEINS
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<          PETRIFIED HUMAN FINGERS
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http://www.edconrad.com/pics/FINGERSx.jpg
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<         PETRIFIED HUMAN SKULL
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Wilton M. Krogman, who wrote the book "The
Human Skeleton n Forensic Medicine," identified
this fossil as a petrified human calvarium, a human
skull with the eye-sockets broken off).
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http://www.edconrad.com/oldascoal/cmon_files/krogwskull.jpg
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http://www.edconrad.com/pics/OldestHumanSkull.JPG
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Haversian canals -- the tell-tale sign of bone -- were documented
existing in this specimen.
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===========================
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"COME OVER HERE, DOCTOR.
I WANT YOU TO SEE THE OLDEST
HUMAN SKULL EVER FOUND."
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-- Wilton M. Krogman to a colleague
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================
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<       PETRIFIED HUMAN FEMUR
http://www.edconrad.com/pics/z8femur.jpg
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===============
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<  HUMAN SKULL EMBEDDED IN A BOULDER
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Photo shows the boulder after it was removed from
between anthracite veins at a depth of some 250 feet.
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http://www.edconrad.com/oldascoal/page3_files/body_data/skulla.jpg
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Photo reveals the dramatic similarity to the contour
of a human cranium.
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http://www.edconrad.com/oldascoal/page3_files/body_data/skullb.jpg
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American Medical Laboratories ALSO identified dried
blood in granules removed from the inner surface of what
bears a distinct likeness to -- and IS -- a human cranium.
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In addition, more than a half-dozen key human fossils
were tested by American Medical Laboratories (AML),
the most prestigious medical lab in the world, which
reported -- in writing -- that they contain dried blood.
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<  ANOTHER NAIL IN EVOLUTIONISTS' COFFIN
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Dr. Jeremy Dahl, one of the world's leading bone
experts and former longtime director of the Yerkes
Regional Primate Research Center in Atlanta, had
examined and tested one of Ed Conrad's specimens
and -- in writing -- had identified it as petrified B-O-N-E.
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<       OTHER PETRIFIED REMAINS
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http://www.edconrad.com/pics/newtibia.jpg
http://www.edconrad.com/pics/HumanJaw3.jpg
http://www.edconrad.com/pics/GallBladder2.jpg
http://www.edconrad.com/pics//z3dino.jpg
http://www.edconrad.com/pics/LargeTooth5.jpg
http://www.edconrad.com/pics/Fetus6.jpg
http://www.edconrad.com/pics/Fetuses2.jpg
http://www.edconrad.com/pics/Scorpion.jpg
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OTHER MIND-BOGGLING DISCOVERIES
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<        WORLD'S OLDEST TOOL
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http://www.edconrad.com/pics/OldestTool.jpg
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<                EARS, JOHNNY!
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http://www.edconrad.com/images/inslate_mysterious.jpg
http://www.edconrad.com/images/inslate5.jpg
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http://www.edconrad.com/pics/FirstDiscovery.jpg
http://www.edconrad.com/pics/InSlate3.jpg
http://www.edconrad.com/pics/InSlate2.jpg
http://www.edconrad.com/pics/InSlate11.jpg
http://www.edconrad.com/images/inslate.gif
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MAN AS OLD AS COAL
http://www.edconrad.com
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http://groups.google.com/group/alt.fan.ed-conrad/msg/522305f02e955b66
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PROOF OF LIFE AFTER DEATH
http://www.edconrad.org
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This is Ed Conrad's picture in case
you want to throw darts at it.
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http://www.edconrad.com/pics/Dartboard.jpg