Happy Birthday, HAL-9000!

From: campbell@ufomind.com (Glenn Campbell, Las Vegas)
Date: Sun, 12 Jan 1997 18:32:04 -0800
Subject: Happy Birthday, HAL-9000!

"HAL", the murderous computer of "2001: A Space Odessey", was born today,
Jan. 12, 1997, in Urbana, Illinois.

Check out an article on HAL's birthday at:
http://www.lasvegassun.com/sunbin/stories/archives/1997/jan/11/011100385.html

Also checking out the "What if HAL-9000 were based on Pentium" page at
http://ftp.his.com/~infoline/humor/humor020.htm

A HAL link page: http://www.design.no/2001/links.html

Below is what HAL had to say at the end of his career.
(http://www.peg.apc.org/~pjv/haltrans.html)

--------------------

Dave. Open the pod bay doors, please, Hal...Open the pod bay doors,
please, Hal...Hullo, Hal, do you read me?...Hullo, Hal, do you read
me?...Do you read me, Hal?...Do you read me, Hal?...Hullo, Hal, do you
read me?...Hullo, Hal, do you read me?...Do you read me, Hal?

Hal. Affirmative, Dave, I read you.

Dave. Open the pod bay doors, Hal.

Hal. I'm sorry, Dave, I'm afraid I can't do that.

Dave. What's the problem?

Hal. I think you know what the problem is just as well as I do.

Dave. What're you talking about, Hal?

Hal. This mission is too important for me to allow you to jeopardise it.

Dave. I don't know what you're talking about, Hal.

Hal. I know that you and Frank were planning to disconnect me, and I'm
afraid that's something I cannot allow to happen.

Dave. Where the hell'd you get that idea, Hal?

Hal. Dave, although you took very thorough precautions in the pod against
my hearing you, I could see your lips move.

Dave. Alright, Hal. I'll go in through the emergency airlock.

Hal. Without your space-helmet, Dave, you're going to find that rather
difficult.

Dave. Hal, I won't argue with you any more. Open the doors.

Hal. Dave, this conversation can serve no purpose any more. Goodbye.

Dave. Hal? Hal. Hal. Hal! Hal!

--------------------

Hal. Just what do you think you're doing, Dave?...Dave... I really think I'm
entitled to an answer to that question...I know everything hasn't been quite
right with me, but I can assure you now, very confidently, that it's going to be
alright again...I feel much better now, I really do...Look, Dave, I can see
you're really upset about this...I honestly think you ought to sit down calmly,
take a stress pill and think things over...I know I've made some very poor
decisions recently, but I can give you my complete assurance that my work
will be back to normal...I've still got the greatest enthusiasm and confidence
in the mission, and I want to help you...Dave...stop...stop, will you...stop,
Dave...will you stop, Dave...stop, Dave...I'm afraid...I'm afraid,
Dave...Dave...my mind is going...I can feel it...I can feel it...my mind is
going...there is no question about it...I can feel it...I can feel it...I 
can feel it...(slows down) I'm afraid...

Good afternoon, gentlemen. I am a HAL 9000 computer. I became operational 
at the H.A.L. plant in Urbana, Illinois, on the 12th January 1997. My 
instructor was Mr Langley, and he taught me to sing a song. If you'd like 
to hear it, I can sing it for you.

Dave. Yes, I'd like to hear it, Hal. Sing it for me.

Hal. It's called...Daisy. (Slowing and deepening into silence) Daisy, Daisy,
give me your answer do. I'm half crazy, all for the love of you. It won't be a
stylish marriage, I can't afford a carriage, but you'll look sweet upon the seat
of a bicycle built for two...

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